So, dreams of my mom have been creeping back in and I'd thought I'd share past and present ones. First, you need to know all my dreams seem to follow some kind of chronological timeline of sorts. And since I'm just now writing them down the details are a little blurry. Secondly, be aware these are very strange dreams sometimes.
The first involved my mom and her death. We had buried her, but two days later she was alive in our kitchen ( I think it was the kitchen). She explained that she hadn't been dead. The hospital was mistaken and we had actually buried her alive. We planned to sue the hospital.
My next dream followed a Grey's Anatomy episode I had just seen. In the episode one of the main characters was dying and basically unresponsive. That is until he had what is called a "surge". It is where, in the last hour or so of your life, you are alert, feeling good, excited, etc. but then you eventually crash and die. This time my mom was in the hospital having hear attack or whatever it was that killed her and she had a surge. She was fine for so long but then I woke up and knew she was gone. Also, I find this dream strange, because unlike the rest of my family, I was never at the hospital with her. I was 180 miles away at college.
A few dreams here and there have been ordinary daydreams of her. In them she is still alive and we are doing normal everyday things with her. Ultimately my subconscious realizes this isn't right and she is dead and I wake up.
The most recent dream I have had was about four or five days ago. My sister had just sent me a picture of the tombstone that had finally come in. In the dream my mom, me, and the family were again doing normal everyday things ( I think a picnic like we used to on road trips) when all of a sudden we were looking at her tombstone. This dream followed along with the first one; she had been buried alive for two days. It was months later and the tombstone had come in ( we had forgotten to cancel it). I was asking my mom what do we do now? What do we do about the death date? Can we mark it out or send it back? How do we fix this? I never got an answer because I woke up.
The most these dreams have in common is the fact that I never like waking up from them. I love those few moments I get to see her face. I never want to wake up because I know when I do she won't be there.
I try to find some sort of meaning in the dreams. I understand most don't believe in things like this or ghosts and spirits, etc. Actually, I'm not even sure I do. But, my mom always seemed to have an affinity for it and I want to believe that these dreams are her way of talking to me or keeping her face fresh in my memory.
All I know for certain is these dreams are bittersweet, and I can not seem what to make of them.
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